How to lose a whole day


Step 1: Buy TOMS online, despite not having any money. Just do it. Everyone at school has TOMS, and they’re perfect for contra dancing. Dancing in boots means having to wear pants, and it’s too hot for that. Get a darker color than last time though, because canvas-colored TOMS show dirt instantly. Black ones have buffalos on the inside! It’s a sign!
Step 2: Have a schedule that keeps you out of the house all day, and causes you to miss the delivery guy the first two times he comes.
Step 3: Look up where the UPS store is to see if it would be possible to pick up the package.
Step 4: Realize that it’s insanely far away. Swear. Curse not having a car. Curse the decision to buy shoes when you don’t have any money. Curse the UPS people for coming at stupid times and having a far-away location.
Step 5: Skip school. Plan on having the package magically come in the morning and making it to class late.
Step 6: Waste the whole freaking day being stuck at home waiting for the doorbell to ring.

The doorbell never rang. I’m not sure if the delivery person rang the wrong bell, or didn’t ring the bell and just expected me to wait on the stoop, but I never heard it, and now my TOMS are stuck at the UPS store, and my feet are bare. I missed two classes, and a workout class that I really wanted to attend and I have nothing to show for it. It’s very aggravating.


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