It won’t be the end of the world if I don’t get into a grad program this go ’round. It’ll feel that way, but only for awhile, then I’ll move on, and try again. Except if I don’t get in because my applications are incomplete because my references never send in the forms. Then I will lose my mind. It’s one thing if I’m not good enough. I can accept that, and try to be better. If this doesn’t work out because my applications were incomplete though…that’s a horse of a different color. That will break my heart. SO. Even though the semester is over, I am going to track down my professor, and actually talk to him, out loud (on the phone), and refuse to be ignored. Which sucks. I hate asking for things that people don’t want to freely give. I don’t like confrontation. Heck, I even hate talking on the phone, but I don’t have any choice. It shouldn’t be easy, but I don’t understand why it has to be this kind of hard. What does this say about my worthiness of becoming a nurse, that I have to put my future in the hands of people who don’t honor promises?